On a whim, I went to go see "Hide and Seek" last night. I was entirely bored. Luckily, my friend Ryan and I whispered and giggled throughout the film. Instead of being mindlessly entertained, I was mindlessly drawn to thoughts of Dakota Fanning, her current superstardom, and upcoming, naturally counterbalanced fall from grace.
I can already hear the E! True Hollywood Story voiceover script. At this point in time, we're moments, or at least one commercial break, away from when Dakota develops a prescription drug problem. Or a cocaine problem. Or a drinking problem.
One has to ask: is it wrong to want her to have all three?
The movie wasn't even good-bad, camp-wise. There were a few moments of giggle-inducing pleasure though: Academy Award Nominee Elisabeth Shue has so little to do here, her dewy cleavage upstaged her acting.
Yes, that's right. Her titties were dewy.