Friday, May 18, 2007

Modumpa (Or, Dumpaholic: The Sequel)


It's been some time since I've addressed my scatalogical sensibilties...so, here's a rewrite of Madonna's semi-sort-of-hit song "Jump"

I call it..."Dump":

(spoken):

There’s only so much turd you can hold in one place
The more that I wait, the more shit that I taste

I'm tired of Metamusil paste, it’s time to make my way
I need to squirt some booty waste, but I’m afraid to spray
I want to pass a big load and I can make it alone
I'll work and I'll fight till I push a turd on my own

Are you ready to dump?
Get ready to dump
Don’t ever look back, oh baby
Yes, I’m ready to dump
Then wipe my ass
Get ready to dump!

Constipated from the start, my bowelies and me
Sat on the john to squeeze a fart, but could only pee
My turd's gonna plop on down like the limbs of a tree
It sways and it swings and it bends till you clench it free

Are you ready to dump?
Get ready to dump
Don’t ever look back, oh baby
Yes, I’m ready to dump
Then wipe my ass
Get ready to dump!

(spoken):
There’s only so much you can dump in one place
The more that I wait, the more shit that I taste

I'll work and I'll fight till I push a turd on my own
It sways and it swings and it bends until you get off the throne

I'm still stuck on the throne (my turdies and me) (repeat 7x)

2 comments:

joe to hell said...

which words have you selected for The Big Gay Remix? you know - where one quote is wrapped in a bass drum beat for 8 and a half minutes, and no other lyric is used? what will it be?

TM said...

methinks both of these would work:

"then wipe my ass"

and

"my bowelies and me...my bowelies and me"