Monday, July 02, 2007
Doone It and Doone It and Doone It Well (Or, Who's That Cookie?)
You know you're in deep shit when you hear an exclamation like this come from a table full of gay men:
"Poor Judy Garland!"
Or is that typical shit you're in?
My friend Max did exclaim such a thing at a bar once. After a rigorous, five-minute-long analysis of Garland's drug use, our drunken ramblings turned to the topic of her children. I won't rehash the (again, typical) shit said about Liza Minnelli, but this next statement is worth repeating:
"And that other poor daugher of hers. What was her name? Oh yeah, Lorna Doone. God, what a sad life she had."
We were well into reviewing the many splendors of Grease 2 before we realized...
"Wait, Lorna Doone? That's not her name. It's Lorna Luft."
"God, Judy Garland was so hopped up on pills, she gave birth to a fucking cookie."