Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Requiem For A Michigan Girl (Or, A Forgotten Joke)

Although I bitch and moan and share stories about celebrities here from time to time (see also: "I Peed Where Jessica Lange Peed"), I don't really hack up public figures all that much.

While I'm really itchy to bitch about Madonna's current beyond-plastic appearance, I will repeat an old joke that made me laugh and laugh and laugh in 2003.

After watching Madonna plaintively perform a political-ish song from American Life on TV (uh...Joni Mitchell or Bob Dylan she ain't), my friend Anne looked at me and said:

"You know...Cher knows she's Cher. Why doesn't Madonna know she's Cher?"

At this point...M might want to take a look at the Dark Lady's playbook. Sure, Cher's been plastic since the Pleistocene, but at least she owns her fakery.


Liz Rosenberg said...

As my client Cher one said, "If i want to put my tits on my back, its no ones business but my own"

Unfortunately, my other client, Madonna, took that message the wrong way and instead, put her tits on her face.....where her cheeks are supposed to go

Shirley Heezgay! said...

...and yet...

cher has never admitted to plastic surgery.

madonna on the other hand has YET to admit to it.

she's also made it clear that she has no qualms about a little nip/tuck if necessary.

i'm just sayin.

Greg said...

I don't care about the plastic surgery, but her arms at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame... she looked like Iggy Pop!

T$ said...

liz - just tell the lady in question to own her dontatellaness.

shirl - huh? cher talks about her surgeries all the time (see liz above).

greg - indeed. when I saw the pictures of the two of them together, I could only think: "which one's madonna?" luckly, the Ig was easier to differentiate since he was topless.

liz rosenberg said...

My client, Madonna, will be pleased to know that she is in such formidable company as Ms. Versace, as they have been close friends for years and consider themselves intimate confidantes. One can only assume that they have shared not only many great times, but also the secrets of their beauty regimens.

joe said...

Love the drawing. How much to commission you to do a portrait of me in the same style? Ha!

I know... if I have to ask, I can't afford it....

liz rosenberg said...

Currently, Trevor is not my client. But as a reputable publicist, I'd like to secure him as part of my stable of artists, along with Cher, Madonna, Bette Midler and Stevie Nicks.

Once that has been set, I'd be happy to discuss rates and options with you.

Shirley Heezgay! said...

that's what i meant.

aw, forget it.

she lookin' freaky.