Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Bist Du Ein Warm Brüder? (Or, A Belated Krautastic Tuesday)

Last week I was all hot and bothered for this week's Krautastic Tuesday topic...and here I sit on the following (ahem) Wednesday without an entry.

So...that hot-to-trotty entry will wait another week. In its stead, here's a mini-krauty two-parter that's semi-related to the topic I was so worked up about.

Warm Brüder is a German slang term for a homosexual male. It's quite endearing when translated...it literally means warm brother...perhaps implying that man-to-man action is purely accidental:

"Gerhardt and I were so cold sleeping in separate beds. We got in bed together to keep warm...and the next thing we knew...we were shopping for matching his-and-his towels and setting up house on Nollendorfplatz."

So, the next time you're out and about and need to greet a German, kindly ask:

"Bist du ein Warm Brüder?"

As for part two of this mini-entry that's rambling on to full-size...it has to do with something near and dear to my heart: kraut.

I have been craving sauerkraut lately...I'm not sure why. I did eat some on a disturbingly large hot dog a few weeks ago at the Brooklyn Diner in Times Square. I ordered the diner's famous hot dog...which turned out to be insanely pornographic. I had to cut it down to thirds - I
was afraid of looking like I was trying to give head to John Holmes in front of a restaurant full of little old ladies and gents.

I nearly asked the waiter:

"Do you have the needle-dick version of this hot dog? This one's a little too girthy."

The kraut, however, was slammin'.


männlichen Tänzer said...

Dies ist Mittwoch, und nicht Dienstag, essen Sie kraut Narr

Darth Gateau said...

slammin' kraut?

I love a meaty banger tho.

joe said...

I'm sure you managed just fine with the girthy hot dog.

And I have to confess I don't think I've ever actually had a bona fide craving for kraut -- sweet-n-sour red cabbage, maybe.

The concept of "slammin kraut" does have its metaphoric upside though....

Big Daddy said...



I love it on Polish and Italian sausages.

With lotsa mustard.