It's been two weeks since I limped up on here with a half-assed post...but I won't say those three words.
Instead, I'll relate a little ditty about one of my favorite topics: the elasticity of the English language.
I've long said how much I love making up new words...and today I was given one as a gift.
I saw this today on a photocopied sign in my gym's locker room:
PLEASE BE CURTIOUS TO OTHER GUESTS.
DO NOT LEAVE YOUR BELONGINGS OVERNIGHT.
At first, I laughed at the misspelling of courteous...until I realized that the misspelling was touched with genius.
While courteous speaks of politeness...the newly coined curtious is about being speedy...quick...curt. Things that New Yorkers admire above all else.
I can't say how many times I wished pedestrians on the sidewalk would be curtious and get the hell out my way.
Other examples of possible uses:
"Your story is awfully long winded. Can you be more curtious?
"Being curtious at parties means coming late and leaving early."
"I had to break it off with Bruce. He was just too curtious in the bedroom."
Of course, had I been the author of the original sign, mine would have read:
PLEASE BE CURTACIOUS TO OTHER GUESTS.
GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER ALREADY AND BEAT IT.