Friday, April 16, 2010

Diggity Dog (Or, Please Return to Your Red State)

Overheard yesterday on the subway:

FLORIDIAN MAN 1: Christopher Street? I hear that's where all the faggot bars are.

FLORIDIAN MAN 2: How you know that?

FLORIDIAN MAN 1: Dunno. Faggots.

FLORIDIAN WOMAN 1: Oh, Christ. We was drunk last night! I don't even 'member the flight in from Lauderdale.

FLORIDIAN WOMAN 2: Shit, I know it girl! WOOOOOO!

FLORIDIAN MAN 1: Then 'member we ate them hot dogs and sammiches off that guy on the street.

FLORIDIAN MAN 2: Right. That was expensive. We paid 'bout twenty bucks for those hot dogs and sammiches.

FLORIDIAN WOMAN 1: Oh man...that hot dog was gooooooooooooood.

FLORIDIAN WOMAN 2: Yeah, it was hot too. That hot dog was hotttt! Woooooo!

FLORIDIAN MAN 1: What are we goin' drink tonight? Whiskey?

FLORIDIAN MAN 2: Beer.

FLORIDIAN WOMAN 1: Beer.

FLORIDIAN WOMAN 2: Beeeeeer! WOOOOOO! NEW YORK CITY!!!

FLORIDIAN WOMAN 1: I can't even believe we is here.

FLORIDIAN MAN 1: Where the fuck is the Statue of Liberty? We got to git off at Rectum Street.

FLORIDIAN MAN 2: Rectum?

FLORIDIAN WOMAN 1: This subway car is moving too fast!

FLORIDIAN WOMAN 2: I know. It's like a ride at Universal Studios! WOOOOOO!

They got off at Rector Street. Hopefully they got lost and jumped by a roving gang of Financial District Faggots.

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